Asked assistance to do it with sincerity. My prayer was answered in an unusual degree. I had a clearer view of my own vileness and depravity, and a more distinct and satisfying perception of Christ's all-sufficiency and goodness, by far, than I ever enjoyed before; so that I was ready to think I had never known any thing of the matter. Was enabled to say, Abba, Father! in the true spirit of adoption, and to exercise strong faith in Christ and love to him.

'MARCH 30.-Had more comfort in ordinances than ever before. I was almost ready to think this the period of my conversion. The transport I felt was more rational and penetrating, than I ever before experienced. It arose from an apprehension of the perfect sufficiency of Christ in all his offices, and from a clear discovery of God as my Father, so that I was enabled to trust, rejoice, and exult in him.

APRIL 2.-Was enabled in some measure to guard against a peevish, impatient disposition. In the evening, unusually lively and fervent in prayer.

....

APRIL 5.-Was very much harassed with wandering thoughts, this morning. Sought to Christ for deliverance, and found it. . . . . Have fresh reason to think that visiting is detrimental. In the evening was exceedingly depressed with a sense of my vileness. I wished to shrink from society and observation. Could hardly think of attempting to preach. Threw myself at the feet of my blessed Saviour, and poured forth my sorrows and complaints before him. Yet I suspect there was more of self than any other principle in my tears.

'APRIL 8.-Was much exercised to-day on the subject of election, and other truths connected with it. Have been much in doubt respecting offering myself for examination next month. Fear I am not under the influence of proper motives.

'APRIL 13.-Sabbath. Felt the love of God sweetly

shed abroad in my heart. Continued in this frame all the morning. Derived much more advantage from ordinances than usual, especially from the sacrament. A profitable day.

'APRIL 13.-Was in a comfortable frame this morning. Had some assistance in speaking to my scholars. But alas! my heart before noon betrayed me into sin. I fell into a passion with an inanimate substance; and thought, if I did not utter curses. Was soon aroused to a sense of my folly and guilt.

'APRIL 19.-I know not why, but this has been the worst week I have had these six months. Believe I expected too much from the sacrament.

'APRIL 20.-Had some sense of my miserable state, but little fervency in seeking relief. Suspect the weather and my health have some influence on me. In the evening had more fervency, but not more sensible assistance. Was, however, resigned to my Master's will, and enabled to trust in him.

APRIL 26.-Was much favoured in my approaches to the throne of grace to-day.

'MAY 1.-Rose early and had some life and comfort. Have been so much engaged in preparing my sermon for examination, that my mind has been much taken off from religion. I find that writing sermons is not praying.

'MAY 4.-It is now long since I have enjoyed any of those sweet seasons of communion with God, which used to be my chief happiness. I fear I have neglected the Scriptures too much. Am determined to pay more attention to them.

' MAY 13.—This was the day on which I intended to be examined before the Association, but it pleased God to prevent it. In the evening reflected on my late coldness and backwardness in religion, and resolved by the help of divine grace to run with more alacrity, the race set before me.

'MAY 18.-I think I never was so favoured in prayer for so long a period in my life. At meeting, tolerably lively. In the intermission, and after meeting, was enabled to spend the time profitably, so that I never was favoured with a more profitable sabbath.

'MAY 19.-Enjoyed considerable fervour in the morning, and some life in speaking to my scholars. Engaged in a dispute at breakfast; and foolishly became angry. Retired and prayed for him with whom I was angry, and for myself. Was enabled, in a considerable degree, to conquer my anger in this matter.

MAY 20.-Find some remains of ing all my endeavours to suppress it.

anger,

notwithstand

'MAY 22.-Since I began, in pursuance of my design, to read the Scriptures, I have enjoyed more of the divine presence than before.

'MAY 23.-Was favoured in prayer. Was applied to by the select-men to deliver an oration on the 4th of July. Refused at first; but being persuaded to consider of it, pride and vanity prevailed, and I foolishly complied. Mem. Never to consider, when I have a presentiment at first, what I ought to do.

'MAY 26.-Found much of the divine presence in duties, this morning. I spoke with some freedom to the boys. Determined to set this apart as a day of fasting and prayer, to humble myself for that sin for which I now suffer, [complying with the above request.] Was very dull and lifeless during the first part of the time. Afterwards was enabled to trust the affair wholly in the hands of God, without any care or anxiety respecting it. Was favoured with a sense of pardon and love.

'Sabbath, JUNE 1.-Sacrament. Enjoyed much of the divine presence and assistance in prayer and meditation. Have never had a more profitable morning. Found my Saviour in his ordinances. Hope I have found this a good day. Seemed to feel more property in Christ and

his benefits, than I had ever done before. After meeting, was filled with the blessed consolations of the Spirit. Oh how refreshing are those foretastes of heaven! How ravishing the presence of Jesus! Felt a full assurance of my interest in the blessings purchased by Christ. No doubts obscured the sunshine of my mind. God be praised.

'JUNE 9.-Resolved to spend all the time before six, in religious exercises. Enjoyed some comfort in prayer. JUNE 15.-Sabbath. Never felt such strong and lively faith in prayer, as this morning. It seemed as if I had nothing to do, but to take whatever I pleased.

'JUNE 17.-Was much harassed with wandering thoughts in morning prayer. Was much assisted in my studies.

'JUNE 28.-Felt myself exceedingly vile. Found no comfort in the exercises of public worship. My oration is a snare to me. Oh what an astonishing, bewitching power a thirst for applause has over my mind! I know that it is of no consequence what mankind think of me, and yet I am continually seeking their approbation.

JUNE 29.-Sabbath. Rose early, and was favoured with the presence and assistance of the blessed Spirit in prayer. O, how sweet and refreshing it is to pour out our souls before God! O, the wonderful and unmerited goodness of God in keeping me from openly disgracing my profession. If he had left me one moment to myself, I had been ruined. Next Sabbath is the sacrament. God grant that it may be a refreshing season to me, and many others.

'JULY 2.-Still harassed and perplexed about my oration. Could not have believed that the desire of applause had gained such power over me.

'JULY 4.-Was enabled to ask for assistance to perform the services of the day. In the evening felt in a most sweet, humble, thankful frame. How shall I praise the Lord for all his goodness!

'JULY 5.-Felt much of the same temper I experienced yesterday. In the evening, was favoured with much of the divine presence and blessing in prayer.

O that

'JULY 6.-Sabbath. My infinitely gracious God is still present, to make his goodness pass before me. He has been with me this morning in prayer, and enabled me sweetly to say, My Father, My God. At the Sacrament, he favored me with some tokens of his presence. I could find words to express half his goodness, or my own vileness. I hope my faith received some increase. But what I desire to praise my God for, is his wonderful goodness in assisting me against pride.

'JULY 7.—Still favoured with the smiles of my blessed Lord. Surely his loving kindness is better than life. How condescendingly kind! I hope he is teaching me the value of worldly applause, and how incompetent it is to afford happiness. I have had enough to satisfy me, if there were any satisfaction in it. But happiness is to

be found in God alone.

'JULY 18.-Very little comfort in prayer. Have fallen into a sad lifeless state the week past. Hope it will convince me, more strongly than ever, of my weakness and vileness. Sat up till two o'clock at night, talking with Mr. —, on religious topics. Found he had more to say in defence of Unitarianism, than I could have supposed. ‘JULY 23.—I am entirely stupid. Am sensible of my situation, and mourn over it, but cannot escape.

'JULY 24.-No life at all. O that it were with me as in months past!-In the evening was favoured with more of the divine presence than I have enjoyed this fortnight.

'JULY 25.-Spent the day, according to previous resolution, in fasting and prayer. Was favored with much of the divine presence and blessing, so that it was a comfortable and profitable day to me. Called to mind the events of my past life, the mercies I have received, and the ill returns I have made for them. Felt a deep sense of

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