+ Wit. Ay, madam, that was only a foolish modesty that I could not shake off; therefore I hope you will excuse me, if I durst not think merit alone was a sufficient bait to bob sir Gilbert out of his consent. Ha, ha, ha! Sir G. You are a very merry grig, sir; but have a care you are not bobb'd yourself. Stay till you win, before you laugh; for you are not yet married, I pre sume. Wit. Why no, nor you have not supped yet; yet I hold gold to silver, we both eat before we sleep. Sir G. Why! dost thou think the girl is in haste to marry thee to-night? Wit. I don't say that neither; but, sir, as long as I have a sufficient deposit of the lady's inclinations, to answer for the rest of her promises, you will give me leave not to be afraid of her looking out for a new chap in the mean time, sir. Sir G. A deposit! why wouldst thou persuade me the girl can be fool enough to like thee? Wit. 'Egad, I don't know how it is, but she has wit enough, it seems, to make me think so-but if you won't take my word, let her answer for herself. Sir G. Ay, that I would be glad to hear. Wit. Ha, ha! 'Egad, this is a pleasant question indeed -Madam, are not you willing, (as soon as the churchbooks can be open) to make a transfer of your whole stock of beauty to your humble servant? Char. Indeed, papa, I won't suppose that can be a question. Wit. A hum! your humble servant, sir. Char. Beside, are not you obliged to sign a further deed of consent to Mr. Witling? Sir G. Yes, child; but the same deed reserves to you a right of refusal, as well as to him. Char. That I understand, sir; and there's one can witness for whom I have reserved that right of refusal. [Pointing to Frankly. Wit. Your humble servant, again, sir; ha, ha, ha! think she could be under the least difficulty in the choice. Frank. And yet, madam, there are very innocent ladies, that have made a difficulty of changing their inclinations in half an hour. Lady W. A woman of strict virtue, sir, ought to have no inclinations at all: or, if any, those only of being obedient to the will of her parents. Wit. Oh, let him alone, madam; the more he rails, the more I shall laugh, depend upon't: the pain of a rival is the pleasantest game in the world: his wishing me at the devil, is just the same thing as if he wished me joy! ha, ha, ha! Sir G. Well, sir, all I shall say, is, that if the girl has common sense, thy contract must still be good for nothing. Wit. Right! and if you had common sense, I am sure you would never have made it; not but, to do you justice, sir Gilbert, I must own, you have wit in your way too, though it's of a very odd turn, I grant you. Sir G. Sir, you take a great deal of liberty with me; insomuch, that I must tell you, I am not sure I won't pay the forfeit of my contract rather than part with my daughter to a coxcomb--and so take it as you will. Lady W. Mr. Wrangle! what do you mean by this brutality? Frank. Mr. Witling, madam, will take nothing ill that I think fit to justify, I am sure. Wit. No, faith! you need not fear it; I'll marry before I'll fight, depend upon't. Ha, ha! Lady W. Mr. Witling, I beg you come away this moment I'll undertake to do your merit justice. I'll see who dares pretend to govern in this family beside myself. Charlotte, give him your hand-Come, sirWit. I am all obedience, madam-your humble servant, Mr. Frankly-Would you woo her [Exit singing, with Charlotte. Frank. Admirably well done, sir! Now, if you can but stand it out as stoutly with my lady, our business is done. Sir G. If!-Will you stand by me? Frank. Will you give me your authority, sir, to handle her roundly, and make her know who ought to be her master! Sir G. My authority! ay, and thanks into the bargain -Come along, I'll send for the lawyer now-Mr. Frankly, my blood rises at her; she shall find I'll vindicate the honour of the city, and, from this moment, demolish her petticoat government. Frank. Well said; I'll warrant you, sir. [Exeunt. Enter SIR GILBERT and FRANKLY. Sir G. My dear Frankly, I could not rest till I had thee alone again; thou hast gained upon me for ever: your vindicating the husband's authority, and taking my wife a peg lower before my face, has tickled my fancy to that degree, that, odzooks! I could wish in my heart thou hadst been married to her. Frank. Oh, I should be loath to have robbed you, sir, of that happiness. Sir G. A-hum! you are right, you are right; I did not think of that indeed. Well; it's a very odd thing now, that a wife will sooner be kept under by any man than her husband: why the deuce can't I govern her so? Frank. There's no great secret in the matter, sir; for take any couple in Christendom, you will certainly find, that the more troublesome of the two is always head of the family. Sir G. By my troth, I believe you are right; and since the war is begun, I'll make a fair push for it. I E am resolved now to thwart her in every thing; and if Granger has but wit enough to talk Sophronia into her senses; that is, if he can but convince her that she is flesh and blood, and born to breed, like other women; odzooks! he shall marry immediately: I'll plague her ladyship that way too. Frank. And, if I don't mistake, sir, Granger is in a fair way there too; for, to my knowledge, he has been locked up with her this half hour here in her library. Sir G. The dickens! Frank. Did not you observe them steal off together just before the music? Sir G. I wondered, indeed, what was become of them; by the lord Harry, I am glad of it-I must have a peep at them. [Goes to the Key-hole] Odso! they are just a coming forth. Frank. We had best be out of the way then, that we may not disturb them. Sir G. No, no, I'll warrant you; pr'ythee, let us stand and observe what passes. Frank. Quick! quickly then; here they come. [They retire. Enter GRANGER with SOPHRONIA. Soph. Oh, Granger! still preserve this purity, And my whole soul will open to receive thee. Gran. Hear this, ye bright immortal choirs above, And own that human souls, like you, can love. Sir G. Hey-day! this is downright love in a tragedy! Well; he's a comical thief. Gran. Oh, harmony of heart! Oh, spotless passion! Here, on this hand, the altar of my vows, I offer up my purer part, my soul, To thine, and swear inviolable Soph. Hold! Passions, like ours, no formal vows require; |