Page images
PDF
EPUB

obliged to take the same kind of liberty, and to entertain my reader with the leavings of a former treat. I must this day have recourse to the same method, and beg my guests to sit down to a kind of Saturday's dinner. To let the metaphor rest, I intend to fill up this paper with a bundle of letters relating to subjects on which I have formerly treated, and have ordered my bookseller to print at the end of each letter, the minutes with which I endorsed it, after the first perusal of it.

"TO ISAAC BICKERSTAFFE, Esq.

"SIR,

Nov. 22, 1710. "DINING yesterday with Mr, South-British, and Mr. William North-Briton, two gentlemen, who, be fore you ordered it otherwise, were known by the names of Mr. English, and Mr. William Scott; among other things, the maid of the house (who in her time I believe may have been a North-British warming-pan) brought us up a dish of North-British collops. We liked our entertainment very well, only we observed the table-cloth, being not so fine as we could have wished, was North-British cloth: but the worst of it was, we were disturbed all dinner-time by the noise of the children, who were playing in the paved court at North-British hoppers; so we paid our North-Briton sooner than we designed, and took coach to North-Briton yard, about which place most of us live. We had, indeed, gone afoot, only we were under some apprehensions lest a North-British mist should wet a South-British man to the skin.

"We think this matter properly expressed, according to the accuracy of the new style settled by

[blocks in formation]

See if this letter be conformable to the direc

tions given in the Tattler above mentioned.

"TO ISAAC BICKERSTAFFE, Esq.

"SIR,

[ocr errors]

Kent, Nov. 22, 1710. "A gentleman in my neighbourhood, who happens to be brother to a lord, though neither his father nor grandfather were so, is perpetually making use of this phrase, A person of my quality.' He has it in his mouth fifty times a day, to his labourers, his servants, his children, his tenants, and his neighbours. Wet or dry, at home or abroad, drunk or sober, angry or pleased, it is the constant burthen of his style. Sir, as you are censor of Great-Britain, as you value the repose of a loyal country, and the reputation of my neighbour, I beg you will take this cruel grievance into your consideration, else, for my own particular, I am resolved to give up my farni, sell my stock, and remove with my wife and seven children next spring to Falmouth, or Berwick, if my strength will permit me, being brought into a very weak condition. I am, with great respect,

**

"Sir,

"Your most obedient,

"And languishing servant, &c."

Let this be referred to the court of honour.

"MR. BICKERSTAFFE,

"I am a young lady of a good fortune, and at present invested by several lovers, who lay close siege to me, and carry on their attacks with all possible diligence. I know which of them has the first place in my own heart, but would freely cross my private inclinations, to make choice of the man who loves me best, which it is impossible for me to know, all of them pretending to an equal passion for me. Let me therefore beg of you, dear Mr. Bickerstaffe, to lend me your Ithuriel's spear, in order to touch this. troop of rivals; after which I will most faithfully return it to you again, with the greatest gratitude.

"I am, Sir, &c."

Query 1. What figure this lady doth think her lover will appear in? Or what symptoms he will betray of his passion upon being touched?

2. Whether a touch of her fan may not have the same efficacy as a touch of Ithuriel's spear

?

Great Lincoln's-Inn-Square, Nov. 29.

"HONOURED SIR,

" GRATITUDE obliges me to make this public ac-knowledgment of the eminent service you have done myself in particular, and the whole body of chaplains. (I hope) in general. Coming home on Sunday about dinner-time, I found things strangely altered for the better the porter smiled in my face when he let me in, the footman bowed to me as I passed him, the steward shook me by the hand, and Mrs. Beatrice dropped me a curtsey as she went along. I was surprized at all this civility, and knew not to what I might ascribe it, except to my bright beaver and

shining scarf, that were new that day. But I was still more astonished to find such an agreeable change at the table: my lord helped me to a fat slice of venison with his own hand, and my lady did me the honour to drink to me. I offered to rise at my usual time, but was desired to sit still, with this kind expression: Come, doctor, a jelly or a conserve will do you no harm; don't be afraid of the dessert.' I was so confounded with the favour, that I returned my thanks in a most aukward manner, wondering what was the meaning of this total transformation: but my lord soon put an end to my admiration, by showing me a paper that challenged you, Sir, for its author, and rallied me very agreeably on the subject, asking me, which was best handled, the lord or his chaplain? I owned myself to think the banter sharpest against ourselves, and that these were trifling matters, not fit for a philosopher to insist on. His lordship was in so good a humour, that he ordered me to return his thanks with my own; and my lady joins in the same, with this one exception to your paper, that the chaplain in her family was always allowed minced pies from Allhallows to Candlemas.

"I am, Sir,

"Your most obliged humble servant,

**Requires no answer.

"T. W."

Oxford, Nov. 27.

[ocr errors]

"MR. CENSOR,

"I have read your account of Nova Zembla with great pleasure, and have ordered it to be transcribed in a little hand, and inserted in Mr. Tonson's late

edition of Hudibras. I could wish you would furnish us with more notes upon that author, to fill up the place of those dull annotations with which several editions of that book have been encumbered. I would particularly desire of you to give the world the story of Talicotius, who makes a very eminent figure in the first Canto, not having been able to meet with any account of the said Talicotius in the writings of any other author. I am, with the most profound respect,

"The most humble of your admirers,

"Q. Z."

To be answered next Thursday, if nothing more material intervenes.

"MR. CENSOR,

"In your survey of the people, you must have observed crowds of single persons that are qualified to increase the subjects of this glorious island, and yet neglect that duty to their country. In order to reclaim such persons, I lay before you this proposal. "Your most obedient servant,

"Th. Cl."

This to be considered on Saturday next.

« PreviousContinue »