Meantime remember, lifeless Drone!
I carry Bucks and Bloods alone.

And oh! whene'er the Weather's friendly,
What Inn at Abingdon or Henly,

But still my vaft Importance feels,

And gladly greets my entering Wheels.

And think obedient to the Thong,

yon gay

How
Street we fmoak along :
While all with envious Wonder view
The Corner turn'd fo quick and true.”

To check an Upftart's empty Pride,
Thus fage the ONE HORSE CHAIR reply'd.

"Pray, when the Confequence is weigh'd, What's all your Spirit and Parade ?

From Mirth to Grief what fad Tranfitions,
To broken Bones and Impofitions!

Or if no Bones are broke, what's worse,
Your Schemes make work for Glass* and Nourse.
On us pray spare your keen reproaches,
From One Horfe Chairs Men rife to Coaches
If calm Discretion's ftedfaft Hand,
With cautious Skill the Reins command.
From me fair Health's freth Fountain springs,
O'er me foft Snugness spreads, her Wings:

*Eminent Surgeons in Oxford

And

And Innocence reflects her Ray
To gild my calm fequefter'd Way:
E'en Kings might quit their State to share
Contentment, and a One Horfe Chair.-
What though, o'er yonder echoing Street.
Your rapid Wheels refound fo fweet;
Shall fis' Sons thus vainly prize
A RATTLE of a larger Size?

BLAGRAVE, who during the Difpute,
Stood in a Corner, fnug and mute,
Surpriz'd, no Doubt, in lofty Verfe,
To hear his Carriages converse,
With folemn Face, o'er Oxford Ale,
To me disclosed this wonderous Tale :
I ftrait dispatched it to the Mufe,
Who brush'd it up for Jackfon's News,
And what has oft' been penn'd in Profe,
Added this Moral at the Clofe.

"Things may be useful if obfcure; "The Pace that's flow is often fure : "When empty Pageantries we prize, "We raise but Duft to blind our Eyes. "The GOLDEN MEAN can best bestow "Safety for unfubftantial bow.

Jackson's OXFORD JOURNAL; where this FABLE first

appeared.

THE

SPLENDID SHILLING. x

Sing, Heavenly Muse,

Things unattempted yet, in Profe or Rhime,
A SHILLING, BREECHES, and CHIMERAS dire.

APPY the Man, who void of Cares and Strife,
In Silken or in Leathern Purse, retains

A SPLENDID SHILLING; He nor hears with Pain
New Oyfters cry'd, nor fighs for chearful Ale;
But with his friends, when nightly Mists arise,
To Jun'per's Magpye, or Town-hall *repairs :
Where mindful of the Nymph, whose wanton Eye
Transfix'd his Soul, and kindled amorous Flames,
CLOE OF PHILLIS; he each circling Glafs
Wifheth her Health, and Joy, and equal Love.
Mean while, he smokes, and laughs at merry Tale,
Or Pun ambiguous, or Conundrum quaint.
But I, whom griping Penury furrounds,
And Hunger, fure attendant upon Want,
With scanty Offals, and small acid Tiff,
(Wretched Repaft!) my meagre Corps fuftain:
Then folitary walk, or doze at home

In Garret vile, and with a warming Puff

* Two noted Alehoufes in Oxford, 17co.

Regale

Regale chill'd Fingers; or from Tube as black
As Winter-Chimney, or well-polished Jet,
Exhale Mundungus ill-perfuming Scent.
Not blacker Tube, nor of a shorter Size,
Sinokes Cambro-Briton (vers'd in Pedigree,
Sprung from Cadwaladur and Arthur, Kings
Full famous in romantick tale) when he
O'er many a craggy Hill and barren Cliff,
Upon a Cargo of fam'd Ceftrian Cheese,
High over-fhadowing, rides, with a Defign
To vend his Wares, or at the Arvonian Mart,
Or Maridunum, or the antient Town
Yeleap'd Brechinia, or where Vaga's Stream
Encircles Ariconium, fruitful Soil!

Whence flow nectareous Wines, that well
With Maffic, Setin, or renown'd Falern.

may

Thus, while my joylefs Minutes tedious flow,
With Looks demure, and filent pace, a Dyn,
Horrible Monster! hated by Gods and Men,
To my aerial Citadel afcends;

With vocal Heel thrice thund'ring at my Gate,
With hideous Accent thrice he calls; I know
The Voice ill-boding, and the folemn Sound.
What fhou'd I do? or whither turn? Amaz'd,

Confounded to the dark Recefs I fly

vie

Of

Confounded to the daik Recefs Ifly
Of Woodhole; ftrait my bruftling Hairs erect
Thro' fudden Fear; a chilly Sweat bedews
My fhud'ring limbs, and (wonderful to tell!)
My Tongue forgets her Faculty of speech;
So horrible he feems! his faded Brow
Entrench'd with many a Frown, and conic Beard,
And spreading Band, admir'd by modern Saints,
Difaftrous Acts forbode; in his Right Hand
Long Scrolls of Paper folemnly he waves,
With Characters, and Figures dire infcrib'd,
Grievous to mortal Eyes; (ye Gods avert

Such Plagues from righteous Men ;) behind him ftalks
Another Monster not unlike himself,

Sullen of Afpect, by the vulgar call'd

A Catchpole, whofe polluted Hands the Gods
With Force incredible, and magick Charms
Erft have endu'd; if he his ample Palm
Should haply on ill-fated Shoulder lay
Of Debtor, ftrait his Body, to the Touch
Obfequious, (as whilom Knights were wont)
To fome inchanted Castle is convey'd,
Where Gates impregnable, and coercive Chains
In Durance ftrict detain him, till in Form
Of Money, PALLAS fets the Captive free.