Of whose strange crimes no Canonift can tell
In what Commandment's large contents they dwell.
One, one man only breeds my just offence; 45
Whom crimes gave wealth, and wealth gave Im-
pudence:

Time, that at last matures a clap to pox,
Whose gentle progress makes a calf an ox,
And brings all natural events to pass,
Hath made him an Attorney of an Afs.
No young divine, new-benefic'd, can be
More pert, more proud, more pofitive than he.
What further could I with the fop to do,
But turn a wit, and fcribble verses too;
Pierce the foft lab'rinth of a Lady's ear 55
With rhymes of this per cent. and that per year?
Or court a Wife, spread out his wily parts,
Like nets or lime-twigs, for rich Widows hearts
Call himself Barrister to ev'ry wench,

50

And wooe in language of the Pleas and Bench? 60 Language, which Boreas might to Auster hold More rough than forty Germans when they scold.

NOTES.

ture or the Gospel commands. A juft ridicule on thofe practica! Commentators, as they are called, who include all moral and religious Duties within them. Whereas their true original

Then fick with Poetry, and poffeft with Muse
Thou waft, and mad I hop'd; but men which chuse
Law practice for meer gain; bold foul repute
Worfe than imbrothel'd ftrumpets prostitute3.
Now like an owl-like watchman he must walk,
His hand ftill at a bill; now he must talk
Idly, like prisoners, which whole months will swear,
That only furetyfhip hath brought them there,
And to every fuitor lye in every thing,

Like a King's Favourite --- or like a King.

NOTES.

fenfe is much more confined, being a fhort fummary of duty fitted for a fingle People, upon a particular occafion, and to ferve tranfitory ends.

VER. 61. Language, which Boreas-] The Original has here a very fine ftroke of fatire,

Than when winds in our ruin'd Abbyes roar.

The frauds with which that work (fo neceflary for the welfare both of religion and the ftate) was begun; the rapine with which it was carried on; and the diffolutenefs in which the plunder arifing from it was wafted, had fcandalized all fober men; and difpofed the best Proteftants to wish, that some part .of that immenfe wealth, arifing from the fuppreffion of the Monafteries, had been referved for Charity, Hofpitality, and even for the public fervice of Religion.

Curs'd be the wretch, fo venal and so vain : Paltry and proud, as drabs in Drury-lane. 'Tis fuch a bounty as was never known, If PETER deigns to help you to your own: What thanks, what praise, if Peter but fupplies, And what a folemn face if he denies! Grave, as when pris'ners fhake the head and swear 'Twas only Suretiship that brought 'em there. 70 His Office keeps your Parchment fates entire, He ftarves with cold to fave them from the fire; For you he walks the streets thro' rain or duft, For not in Chariots Peter puts his trust; For you he sweats and labours at the laws, 'Takes God to witness he affects your cause, And lies to ev'ry Lord in ev'ry thing, Like a King's Favourite --- or like a King.

65

75

NOTES.

a

He speaks here of those illiberal Advocates who frequent the Bar for mere gain, without any purpose of promoting or advancing civil juftice; the confequence of which, he tells us, is a flavish attendance, together with the degradation of their parts and abilities. So that when they undertake to excuse the bad conduct of their client, they talk as idly, and are heard with the fame contempt, as debtors, whofe common cant is, that they were undone by Suretiship. The Imitator did not feem to take the fineness of the fatire, or he would not have neglected an abufe of this importance, to fall upon fuch paultry

Like a wedge in a block', wring to the barre,
Bearing like affes, and more fhameless farre
Than carted whores, lye to the grave Judge; for
Bastardy abounds not in King's titles, nor
Simony and Sodomy in Church-men's lives,
As these things do in him; by these he thrives,
Shortly (as th' fea) he'll compass all the land,
From Scots to Wight, from Mount to Dover strand.
And spying heirs melting with Luxury,
Satan will not joy at their fins as he:
For (as a thrifty wench fcrapes kitchen-stuffe,
And barrelling the droppings, and the fnuffe
Of wafting candles, which in thirty year,
Reliquely kept, perchance buys wedding chear)
Piecemeal he gets lands, and spends as much time
Wringing each acre, as maids pulling prime.
In parchment then, large as the fields, he draws
Affurances, big as glofs'd civil laws,
So huge that men (in our times forwardness)
Are Fathers of the Church for writing less.

NOTES.

things as Peter, and thofe whom Peter confidered (and fo ufed) as his patrimony,

These are the talents that adorn them all,
From wicked Waters ev'n to godly* *
Not more of Simony beneath black gowns,
Nor more of bastardy in heirs to Crowns,
In fhillings and in pence at first they deal;
And steal fo little, few perceive they fteal;
Till, like the Sea, they compass all the land, 84
From Scots to Wight, from Mount to Dover strand:
And when rank Widows purchase luscious nights,
Or when a Duke to Janfen punts at White's,
Or City-heir in mortgage melts away;

Satan himself feels far less joy than they.
Piecemeal they win this acre first, then that, 90
Glean on, and gather up the whole eftate.
Then strongly fencing ill-got wealth by law,
Indentures, Cov'nants, Articles they draw,
Large as the fields themselves, and larger far
Than Civil Codes, with all their Gloffes, are; 95
So vaft, our new Divines, we must confefs,
Are Fathers of the Church for writing less.

80