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forming a remove from one place to another. I should be a cure for the unnatural desire of John Trot for dancing, and a specific to lessen the inclination Mrs. Fidget has to motion, and cause her always to give her approbation to the present place she is in. In fine, no Egyptian mummy was ever half so useful in physic, as I should be to these feverish constitutions, to repress the violent sallies of youth, and give each action its proper weight and repose.

acquired his eloquence. Seneca in his letters to Lucilius assures him there was not a day in which he did not either write something, or read and epitomize some good author; and I remember Pliny in one of his letters, where he gives an account of the various methods he used to fill up every vacancy of time, after several employments which he enumerates; "Sometimes," says he, "I hunt: but even then I carry with me a pocket-book, that whilst my servants I can stifle any violent inclination, and are busied in disposing of the nets and other oppose a torrent of anger, or the solicita- matters, I may be employed in something tions of revenge, with success. Indolence that may be useful to me in my studies; is a stream which flows slowly on, but yet and that if I miss of my game, I may at the undermines the foundation of every virtue.least bring home some of my own thoughts A vice of a more lively nature were a more desirable tyrant than this rust of the mind, which gives a tincture of its nature to every action of one's life. It were as little hazard to be lost in a storm, as to lie thus perpetually becalmed: and it is to no purpose to have within one the seeds of a thousand good qualities, if we want the vigour and resolution necessary for the exerting them. Death brings all persons back to an equality; and this image of it, this slumber of the mind, leaves no difference between the greatest genius, and the meanest understanding. A faculty of doing things remarkably praiseworthy, thus concealed, is of no more use to the owner than a heap of gold to the man

who dares not use it.

To-morrow is still the fatal time when all is to be rectified. To-morrow comes, it goes, and still I please myself with the shadow, whilst I lose the reality: unmindful that the present time alone is ours, the future is yet unborn, and the past is dead, and can only live (as parents in their children,) in the actions it has produced.

with me, and not have the mortification of having caught nothing all day.”

Thus, sir, you see how many examples I recall to mind, and what arguments I use with myself to regain my liberty: but as I am afraid it is no ordinary persuasion that will be of service, I shall expect your thoughts on this subject with the greatest impatience, especially since the good will not be confined to me alone, but will be of universal use. For there is no hope of amendment where men are pleased with their ruin, and whilst they think laziness is a desirable character; whether it be that they like the state itself, or that they think it gives them a new lustre when they do exert themselves, seemingly to be able to do that without labour and application, which others attain to but with the greatest diligence. I am, sir, your most obliged humble servant, SAMUEL SLACK.’

Clytander to Cleone.

'MADAM,-Permission to love you is all that I desire, to conquer all the difficulties those about you place in my way, to surmount and acquire all those qualifications you expect in him who pretends to the honour of being, madam, your most devoted humble servant,

Z.

'CLYTANDER.”

-Fruges consumere nati. Her. Ep. ii. Lib. 1. 27.
-Born to drink and eat. Creech

The time we live ought not to be computed by the number of years, but by the use that has been made of it; thus, it is not the extent of ground, but the yearly rent, which gives the value to the estate. Wretched and thoughtless creatures, in the only place where covetousness were a virtue, we turn prodigals! Nothing lies upon our hands with such uneasiness, nor have No. 317.] Tuesday, March 4, 1711-12. there been so many devices for any one thing, as to make it slide away imperceptibly and to no purpose. A shilling shall be hoarded up with care, whilst that which is above the price of an estate is flung away with disregard and contempt. There is nothing now-a-days, so much avoided, as a solicitous improvement of every part of time; it is a report must be shunned as one tenders the name of a wit and a fine genius and as one fears the dreadful character of a laborious plodder: but notwithstanding this, the greatest wits any age has produced thought far otherwise; for who can think either Socrates or Demosthenes lost any reputation by their continual pains both in overcoming the defects and improving the gifts of nature? All are acquainted with the labour and assiduity with which Tully

death, asked his friends who stood about AUGUSTUS, a few minutes before his him, if they thought he had acted his part well; and upon receiving such an answer as was due to his extraordinary merit, 'Let me, then,' says he, go off the stage with your applause;' using the expression with which the Roman actors made their exit could wish that men, while they are in at the conclusion of a dramatic piece. health, would consider well the nature of the part they are engaged in, and what figure it will make in the minds of those they leave behind them, whether it was

* Vos valete et plaudite.

I

worth coming into the world for; whether | it be suitable to a reasonable being; in short, whether it appears graceful in this life, or will turn to an advantage in the next. Let the sycophant, or the buffoon, the satirist, or the good companion, consider with himself, when his body shall be laid in the grave, and his soul pass into another state of existence, how much it will redound to his praise to have it said of him that no man in England ate better, that he had an admirable talent at turning his friends into ridicule, that nobody out-did him at an illnatured jest, or that he never went to bed before he had despatched his third bottle. These are, however, very common funeral orations and eulogiums on deceased persons who have acted among mankind with some figure and reputation.

Hours ten, eleven, and twelve. Smoked three pipes of Virginia. Read the Supplement and Daily Courant. Things go ill in the north. Mr. Nisby's opinion thereupon. One o'clock in the afternoon. Chid Ralph for mislaying my tobacco-box.

Two o'clock. Sat down to dinner. Mem.
Too many plumbs, and no suet.
From three to four. Took my afternoon's
nap.
From four to six. Walked in the fields.
Wind S. S. E.

From six to ten. At the Club. Mr.
Nisby's opinion about the peace.

Ten o'clock. Went to bed, slept sound.

TUESDAY, being holiday, eight o'clock, rose as usual.

Nine o'clock. Washed hands and face,
shaved, put on my double-soled shoes.
Ten, eleven, twelve. Took a walk to
Islington.

Read Grand vizier

From six to ten. At the club. Mr. Nisby's account of the Great Turk.

But if we look into the bulk of our species, they are such as are not likely to be remembered a moment after their disappearance. They leave behind them no One. Took a pot of Mother Cob's mild. traces of their existence, but are forgotten Between two and three. Returned, dined as though they had never been. They are on a knuckle of veal and bacon. Mem. neither wanted by the poor, regretted by Sprouts wanting. the rich, nor celebrated by the learned. Three. Nap as usual. They are neither missed in the commonFrom four to six. Coffee-house. wealth, nor lamented by private persons. the news. A dish of twist. Their actions are of no significancy to manstrangled. kind, and might have been performed by creatures of much less dignity than those who are distinguished by the faculty of reason. An eminent French author speaks somewhere to the following purpose: I have often seen from my chamber window two noble creatures, both of them of an erect countenance and endowed with reason. These two intellectual beings are employed from morning to night in rubbing two smooth stones one upon another; that is, as the vulgar phrase is, in polishing marble.

Ten. Dream of the grand vizier. Broken sleep.

WEDNESDAY, eight o'clock. Tongue of my shoe-buckle broke. Hands but not face."

Nine. Paid off the butcher's bill. Mem, To be allowed for the last leg of mutton.

Ten, eleven. At the Coffee-house. More work in the north. Stranger in a black wig asked me how stocks went.

From twelve to one. Walked in the fields. Wind to the south.

From one to two. Smoked a pipe and a half.

Two. Dined as usual. Stomach good. Three. Nap broke by the falling of a pewter dish. Mem. Cook-maid in love, and grown careless.

From four to six. At the coffee-house. Advice from Smyrna that the grand vizier was first of all,strangled, and afterwards

My friend, Sir Andrew Freeport, as we were sitting in the club last night, gave us an account of a sober citizen, who died a few days since. This honest man being of greater consequence in his own thoughts than in the eye of the world, had for some years past kept a journal of his life. Sir Andrew showed us one week of it. Since the occurrences set down in it mark out such a road of action as that I have been speaking of, I shall present my reader with a faith-beheaded. ful copy of it; after having first informed Six o'clock in the evening. Was half him, that the deceased person had in his an hour in the club before any body else youth been bred to trade, but finding him- came. Mr. Nisby of opinion that the self not so well turned for business, he had grand vizier was not strangled the sixth for several years last past lived altogether instant. upon a moderate annuity. *

MONDAY, eight o'clock. I put on my clothes and walked into the parlour. Nine o'clock ditto. Tied my knee-strings, and washed my hands.

It has been conjectured that this journal was intended to ridicule a gentleman who was a member of the congregation named Independents, where a Mr. Nes. bit officiated as minister. See John Dunton's account of his Life, Errors and Opinions.

Ten at night. Went to bed. Slept without waking until nine the next morning.

THURSDAY, nine o'clock. Staid within until two o'clock for Sir Timothy; who did not bring me my annuity according to his promise.

Two in the afternoon.
Loss of appetite.
Beef over-corned,

ner.

Sat down to dinSmall-beer sour.

Three. Could not take my nap.

Four and five. Gave Ralph a box on the ear. Turned off my cook-maid. Sent a messenger to Sir Timothy. Mem. I did not go to the club to night. Went to bed at nine o'clock.

FRIDAY. Passed the morning in meditation upon Sir Timothy, who was with me a quarter before twelve.

Twelve o'clock. Bought a new head to my cane, and a tongue to my buckle. Drank a glass of purl to recover appetite.

Two and three. Dined and slept well. From four to six. Went to the coffeehouse. Met Mr. Nisby there. Smoked several pipes. Mr. Nisby of opinion that

laced coffee is bad for the head.

Six o'clock. At the club as steward. Sat late.

Twelve o'clock. Went to bed, dreamt that I drank small beer with the grand vizier. SATURDAY. Waked at eleven, walked

in the fields, wind N. E.

Twelve. Caught in a shower. One in the afternoon. Returned home and dried myself.

Two. Mr. Nisby dined with me. First course, marrow-bones; second, ox-cheek,

with a bottle of Brooks and Hellier.

Three. Overslept myself. Six. Went to the club. Like to have fallen into a gutter. Grand vizier certainly dead, &c.

No. 318.] Wednesday, March 5, 1711-12.

-non omnia possumus omnes. Virg. Ecl. viii. 63. With different talents form'd, we variously excel.

'MR. SPECTATOR,-A certain vice, which you have lately attacked, has not vet been considered by you as growing so deep in the heart of man, that the affectahave observed, that men who have been tion outlives the practice of it. You must bred in arms preserve to the most extreme and feeble old age, a certain daring in their aspect. In like manner, they who have passed their time in gallantry and adventure, keep up, as well as they can, the appearance of it, and carry a petulant incli

nation to their last moments. Let this serve for a preface to a relation I am going to give you of an old beau in town, that has not only been amorous, and a follower of women in general, but also, in spite of the admonition of grey hairs, been from his sixty-third year to his present seventieth, in an actual pursuit of a young lady, the wife of his friend, and a man of merit. The gay old Escalus has wit, good health, and is perfectly well-bred; but from the fashion and manners of the court when he was in his bloom, has such a natural tendency to amorous adventure, that he thought it would be an endless reproach to him to at a gentleman's house, whose good humake no use of a familiarity he was allowed mour and confidence exposed his wife to I question not but the reader will be sur- the addresses of any who should take it in prised to find the above-mentioned journal- their head to do him the good office. It is ist taking so much care of a life that was not impossible that Escalus might also refilled with such inconsiderable actions, and sent that the husband was particularly nereceived so very small improvements; and gligent of him; and though he gave many yet, if we look into the behaviour of many intinations of a passion towards the wife, whom we daily converse with, we shall find the husband either did not see them, or put that most of their hours are taken up in him to the contempt of overlooking them. those three important articles of eating, In the mean time Isabella, for so we shall drinking, and sleeping. I do not suppose call our heroine, saw his passion, and rethat a man loses his time, who is not en-joiced in it, as a foundation for much divergaged in public affairs, or in an illustrious sion, and an opportunity of indulging hercourse of action. On the contrary, I believe self in the dear delight of being admired, our hours may very often be more profit- addressed to, and flattered, with no ill ably laid out in such transactions as make consequence to her reputation. This lady no figure in the world, than in such as are is of a free and disengaged behaviour, apt to draw upon them the attention of ever in good-humour, such as is the image mankind. One may become wiser and bet- of innocence with those who are innocent, ter by several methods of employing one's and an encouragement to vice with those self in secrecy and silence, and do what is who are abandoned. From this kind of laudable without noise or ostentation.I carriage, and an apparent approbation of would, however, recommend to every one his gallantry, Escalus had frequent opporof my readers, the keeping a journal of tunities of laying amorous epistles in her their lives for one week, and setting down way, of fixing his eyes attentively upon her punctually their whole series of employ-actions, of performing a thousand little ofments during that space of time. This fices which are neglected by the unconcernkind of self-examination would give themed, but are so many approaches towards a true state of themselves, and incline them happiness with the enamoured. It was to consider seriously what they are about. now, as is above hinted, almost the end of One day would rectify the omissions of the seventh year of his passion, when Esanother, and make a man weigh all those calus, from general terms, and the ambiguindifferent actions, which though they are easily forgotten, must certainly be accounted for. L.

The motto to this paper in folio was,
*Rideat, et puiset lasciva decentius ætas.”—Her

ous respect which criminal lovers retain in their addresses, began to bewail that his passion grew too violent for him to answer any longer for his behaviour towards her, and that he hoped she would have consideration for his long and patient respect, to excuse the emotions of a heart now no longer under the direction of the unhappy owner of it. Such, for some months, had been the language of Escalus, both in his talk and his letters to Isabella, who returned all the profusion of kind things which had been the collection of fifty years, with "I must not hear you; you will make me forget that you are a gentleman; I would not willingly lose you as a friend;" and the like expressions, which the skilful interpret to their own advantage, as well knowing that a feeble denial is a modest assent. I should have told you, that Isabella, during the whole progress of this amour, communicated it to her husband; and that an account of Escalus's love was their usual entertainment after half a day's absence. Isabella therefore, upon her lover's late more open assaults, with a smile told her husband she could hold out no longer, but that his fate was now come to a crisis. After she had explained herself a little farther, with her husband's approbation, she proceeded in the following manner. The next time that Escalus was alone with her, and repeated his importunity, the crafty Isabella looked on her fan with an air of great attention, as considering of what impor- No. 319.] Thursday, March 6, 1711-12. tance such a secret was to her; and upon the repetition of a warm expression, she looked at him with an eye of fondness, and told him he was past that time of life which could make her fear he would boast of a lady's favour; then turned away her head, with a very well acted confusion, which favoured the escape of the aged Escalus. This adventure was matter of great pleasantry to Isabella and her spouse; and they had enjoyed it two days before Escalus could recollect himself enough to form the following letter:

ness has not destroyed the esteem I had for you, which was confirmed by so many years of obstinate virtue. You have reason to rejoice that this did not happen within the observation of one of the young fellows, who would have exposed your weakness, and gloried in his own brutish inclinations.

"I am, Madam, your most devoted humble servant."

returned the following answer:
'Isabella, with the help of her husband,

"SIR,-I cannot but account myself a
very happy woman, in having a man for a
lover that can write so well, and give so
good a turn to a disappointment. Another
excellence you have above all other pre-
tenders I ever heard of; on occasions where
the most reasonable men lose all their rea-
son, you have yours most powerful. We
have each of us to thank our genius that
the passion of one abated in proportion
as that of the other grew violent. Does it
not yet come into your head to imagine,
that I knew my compliance was the great-
est cruelty I could be guilty of towards
you? In return for your long and faithful
passion, I must let you know that you are
old enough to become a little more gravity;
but if you will leave me, and coquet it any
where else, may your mistress yield.
T.
"ISABELLA."

Quo teneam vultus mutantem Protea nodo?

Hor. Ep. i. Lib. 1. 90. Say while they change on thus, what chains can bind These varying forms, this Proteus of the mind?

Francis.

I HAVE endeavoured in the course of my papers to do justice to the age, and have taken care, as much as possible, to keep myself a neuter between both sexes. I have neither spared the ladies out of complaisance, nor the men out of partiality, but notwithstanding the great integrity with which I have acted in this particular, I "MADAM,-What happened the other find myself taxed with an inclination to faday gives me a lively image of the incon-vour my own half of the species. Whether sistency of human passions and inclinations. it be that the women afford a more fruitful We pursue what we are denied, and place field for speculation, or whether they run our affections on what is absent, though we more in my head than the men, I cannot neglected it when present. As long as you tell; but I shall set down the charge as it refused my love, your refusal did so strongly is laid against me in the following letter. excite my passion, that I had not once the leisure to think of recalling my reason to aid 'MR. SPECTATOR,-I always make one me against the design upon your virtue. among a company of young females, who But when that virtue began to comply in peruse your speculations every morning. I my favour, my reason made an effort over am at present commissioned by our whole my love, and let me see the baseness of my assembly to let you know, that we fear you behaviour in attempting a woman of honour. are a little inclined to be partial towards I own to you, it was not without the most your own sex. We must, however, acviolent struggle that I gained this victory knowledge, with all due gratitude, that in over myself; nay, I will confess my shame, some cases you have given us our revenge and acknowledge, I could not have pre- on the men, and done us justice. We could vailed but by flight. However, madam, I not easily have forgiven you several strokes beg that you will believe a moment's weak-in the dissection of the coquette's heart, if

VOL. II.

2

you had not, much about the same time, made a sacrifice to us of a beau's skull.

You may further, sir, please to remember, that not long since you attacked our hoods and commodes in such a manner, as, to use your own expression, made very many of us ashamed to show our heads. We must therefore beg leave to represent to you that we are in hopes, if you will please to make a due inquiry, the men in all ages would be found to have been little less whimsical in adorning that part than ourselves. The different forms of their wigs, together with the various cocks of their hats, all flatter us in this opinion.

I had an humble servant last summer, who the first time he declared himself, was in a full-bottomed wig; but the day after, to my no small surprise, he accosted me in a thin natural one. I received him at this our second interview as a perfect stranger, but was extremely confounded when his speech discovered who he was. I resolved, therefore to fix his face in my memory for the future; but as I was walking in the Park the same evening, he appeared to me in one of those wigs that I think you call a night-cap, which had altered him more effectually than before. He afterwards play ed a couple of black riding-wigs upon me with the same success, and, in short, assumed a new face almost every day in the first month of his courtship.

upon the hat and feather; however, to wipe off the present imputation, and gratify my female correspondent, I shall here print a letter which I lately received from a man of mode, who seems to have a very extraordinary genius in his way.

*SIR,—I presume I need not inform yỤ 1, that among men of dress it is a commen phrase to say, " Mr. Such-a-one has struck that he is the first man who has had courage à bold stroke:" by which we understand, enough to lead up a fashion. Accordingly, when cur tailers take measure of us, they plain suit, or strike a bold stroke?" I think always demand "whether we will have à I may without vanity say, that I have struck some of the boldest and most successful strokes of any man in Great Britain. I was the first that struck the long pocket about two years since; I was likewise the author of the frosted button, which when I saw the town come readily into, being resolved to strike while the iron was het, I produced much about the same time the scallop flap, for the silver-clocked stocking. the knotted cravat, and made a fair push

modish jacket, or the coat with chee A few months after I brought up the sleeves. I struck this at first in a plain Doily; but that failing, I struck it a second time in a blue camlet, and repeated the I observed afterwards, that the variety it took effect. There are two or three stroke in several kinds of cloth, until at last of cocks into which he moulded his hat, had not a little contributed to his impositions, who have always their eye upon me, and young fellows at the other end of the town

upon me.

Yet, as if all these ways were not sufficient to distinguish their heads, you must doubtless, sir, have observed, that great numbers of young fellows have, for several months last past, taken upon them to wear feathers.

We hope, therefore, that these may, with as much justice, be called Indian princes, as you have styled a woman in a coloured hood an Indian queen; and that you will in due time take these airy gentlemen into consideration.

We the more earnestly beg that you would put a stop to this practice, since it has already lost us one of the most agree able members of our society, who after having refused several good estates, and two titles, was lured from us last week by

a mixed feather.

I am ordered to present you with the respects of our whole company, and am, 'Sir, your very humble servant, 'DORINDA.'

Note. The person wearing the feather, though our friend took him for an officer in the guards, has proved to be an errant linendraper."

I am not now at leisure to give my opinion

* Only an ensign in the train-bands. Spect, in folio.

answer me stroke for stroke. I was once so unwary as to mention my fancy in relaof these gentlemen, who was disingenuous enough to steal my thought, and by that means prevented my intended stroke.

tion to a new-fashioned surtcut before one

I have a design this spring to make very and have already begun with a coup eskai considerable innovations in the waisterat; upon the sleeves, which has succeeded

very well.

I must further inform you, if you will at me, that it is my design to strike such a promise to encourage, or at least to connive stroke the beginning of the next month as shall surprise the whole town.

I do not think it prudent to acquaint dress; but will only tell you, as a sample of you with all the particulars of my intended it, that I shall very speedily appear at White's in a cherry-coloured hat. I took this hint from the ladies' hoods, which I look upon as the boldest stroke that sex has struck for these hundred years last past. I am, sir, your most obedient, most humble servant, WILL SPRIGHTLY.”

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