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With Breast elate beyond Expreffion,
He hurries down to take Poffeffion,
With Rapture views the fweet Retreat
"What a convenient Houfe! how neat!
"For Fuel here's fufficient Wood:

"Pray God the Cellars may be good!
"The Garden - that must be new plann'd

"Shall these old-fashion'd Yew-trees ftand?
"O'er yonder vacant Plot shall rise

"The flow'ry Shrub of thousand Dies:
"Yon Wall, that feels the fouthern Ray,
"Shall blush with ruddy Fruitage gay :
"While thick beneath its Afpect warm
"O'er well-rang'd Hives the Bees shall swarm,
"From which, e'er long, of golden Gleam
"Metheglin's lufcious Juice fhall stream:
"This awkward Hutt, o'er-grown with Ivy,
"We'll alter to a modern Privy:

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Up yon green flope, of Hazels trim, "An Avenue fo cool and dim,

"Shall to an Arbour at the End,

"In fpite of Gout, intice a Friend.

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My Predeceffor lov'd Devotion

"But of a Garden had no Notion."

Continuing

Continuing this fantaftic Farce on,
He now commences country Parfon.
To make his Character entire,
He weds a Coufin of the 'Squire ;
Not over weighty in the Purse,
But many Doctors have done worse :
And though the boafts no Charms divine,
Yet the can carve, and make Birch Wine.

Thus fixt, content he taps his Barrel,
Exhorts his Neighbours not to quarrel;
Finds his Church-wardens have Discerning
Both in good Liquor and good Learning;
With Tythes his Barns replete he sees,
And chuckles o'er his Surplice-fees;

Studies to find out latent Dues,
And regulates the State of Pews;
Rides a fleek Mare with purple Houfing,
To fhare the monthly Club's caroufing;
Of Oxford Pranks facetious tells,
And-but on Sundays-hears no Bells:
Sends Prefents of his choiceft Fruit,
And prunes himself each faplefs Shoot;
Plants Colliflow'rs, and boasts to rear
The earliest Melon of the Year;
C

Thinks

Thinks Alteration charming Work is,

Keeps Bantam Cocks, and feeds his Turkies;
Builds in his Copfe a favourite Bench,

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And stores the Pond with Carp and Tench.→

But ah! too foon his thoughtless Breaft
By Cares domeftic is oppreft;

And a third Butcher's Bill, and Brewing,
Threaten inevitable Ruin :

For Children fresh Expences yet,
And Dicky now for School is fit.
"Why did I fell my College Life
"(He cries) for Benefice and Wife?
"Return, ye Days! when endless Pleasure
"I found in Reading, or in Leifure!
"When calm around the common Room
"I puff'd my daily Pipe's Perfume!
"Rode for a Stomach, and infpected,
"At annual Bottlings, Corks felected:
“And din'd untax'd, untroubled, under
"The Portrait of our pious Founder!
"When Impofitions were supply'd
"To light my Pipe- or footh my

Pride!

"No Cares were then for forward Peas "A yearly-longing Wife to please;

"My

st

My Thoughts no Christ'ning Dinners croft, "No Children cry'd for butter'd Toaft;

"And ev'ry Night I went to Bed, "Without a Modus in my Head!"

Oh! trifling Head, and fickle Heart!
Chagrin'd at whatfoe'er thou art;
A Dupe to Follies yet untry'd,
And fick of Pleasures scarce enjoy'd!
Each Prize poffefs'd, thy Transport ceases,
And in Purfuit alone it pleases.

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A N

EVENING CONTEMPLATION

In a

COLLEGE.

Being a PARODY on GRAY's ELEGY in a COUNTRY CHURCH-YARD.

THE

HE Curfew tolls the Hour of clofing Gates, With jarring Sound the Porter turns the Key, Then in his dreary Manfion flumb'ring waits, And flowly, fternly quits it.... tho' for me.

Now

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