fhort time fhe began to feel the happiness of acting without controul, of being unaccountable for her hours, her expences, and her company; and her company; and learned, by degrees, to drop an expreffion of contempt, or pity, at the mention of ladies whofe hufbands were fufpected of restraining their pleasures, or their play, and confeffed that he loved to go and come as the pleased. I was still favoured with fome incidental precepts and tranfient endearments, and was now and then fondly kiffed for fmiling like my papa: but most part of her morning was spent in comparing the opinion of her maid and milliner, contriving fome variation in her drefs, vifiting fhops, and fending compliments; and the reft of the day was too fhort for vifits, cards, plays, and concerts. Parents She now began to discover that it was impoffible to educate children properly at home. could not have them always in their fight; the fociety of fervants was contagious; company produced boldness and fpirit; emulation excited industry; and a large school was naturally the firft ftep into the open world. A thousand other reafons fhe alledged, fome of little force in themselves, but fo well feconded by pleasure, vanity, and idlenefs, that they foon overcame all the remaining principles of kindness and piety, and both I and my brother were dispatched to boarding schools. How my mamma spent her time when he was thus difburthened I am not able to inform you, but I have reafon to believe that trifles and amufements took ftill fafter hold of her heart. At first, fhe vifited me at fchool, and afterwards wrote to me; but in a fhort time, both her vifits and her letters were at an end, and no other notice was taken of me than to remit money for my fupport. When I came home, at the vacation, I found myfelf coldly received, with an observation," that this girl will presently be a woman." I was, after the ufual stay, fent to fchool again, and overheard my mother fay, as I was a going, "Well, now I fhall recover." In fix months more I came again, and with the ufual childish alacrity, was running to my mother's embrace, when fhe ftopt me with exclamations at the fuddenness and enormity of my growth, having, fhe faid, never seen any body shoot up fo much at my age. She was fure no other girls fpread at that rate, and fhe hated to have children look like women before their time. I was difconcerted, and retired without hearing any thing more than, "Nay, "if you are angry, madam Steeple, you may walk " off." When once the forms of civility are violated, there remains little hope of return to kindness or decency. My mamma made this appearance of refentment a reason for continuing her malignity, and poor Mifs Maypole, for that was my appellation, was never mentioned or fpoken to but with fome expreffion of anger or dislike. She had yet the pleasure of dreffing me like a child, and I know not when I fhould have been thought fit to change my habit, had I not been rescued by a maiden fifter of my father, who could not bear to fee women in hanging-fleeves, and therefore presented me with brocade for a gown, for which I fhould A a 2 fhould have thought myself under great obligations, had the not accompanied her favour with some hints that my mamma might now confider her age, and give me her ear-rings, which fhe had fhewn long enough in publick places. I now left the fchool and came to live with my mamma, who confidered me as an ufurper that had feized the rights of a woman before they were due, and was pushing her down the precipice of age, that I might reign without a fuperior. While I am thus beheld with jealoufy and fufpicion, you will readily believe that it is difficult to pleafe. Every word and look is an offence. I never fpeak, but I pretend to fome qualities and excellencies, which it is criminal to poffefs; if I am gay, the thinks it early enough to coquette; if I am grave, fhe hates a prude in bibs; if I venture into company, I am in hafte for a husband; if I retire to my chamber, fuch matron-like ladies are lovers of contemplation. I am on one pretence or other generally excluded from her affemblies, nor am I ever fuffered to vifit at the fame place with my mamma. Every one wonders why fhe does not bring Mifs more into the world, and when he comes home in vapours I am certain that she has heard either of my beauty or my wit, and expect nothing for the enfuing week but taunts and menaces, contradiction and reproaches. Thus I live in a ftate of continual perfecution, only because I was born ten years too foon, and cannot stop the courfe of nature or of time, but am unhappily a woman before my mother can willingly ceafe to be a girl. I believe you would contribute to the happiness of many families, if, by any any arguments or perfuafions, you could make mothers afhamed of rivalling their children; if you could fhew them, that though they may refufe to grow wife, they muft inevitably grow old; and that the proper folaces of age are not mufick and compliments, but wisdom and devotion; that those who are fo unwilling to quit the world will foon be driven from it; and that it is therefore their intereft to retire while there yet remains a few hours for nobler employments. I am, &c. NUMB. 56. SATURDAY, Sept. 29, 1750. Valeat res ludicra, fi me Palma negata macrum, donata reducit opimum. HOR Farewell the stage; for humbly I disclaim N° FRANCIS. Othing is more unpleafing than to find that offence has been received when none was intended, and that pain has been given to those who were not guilty of any provocation. As the great end of fociety is mutual beneficence, a good man is always uneafy when he finds himself acting in oppofition to the purposes of life; because, though his confcience may eafily acquit him of malice prepense, of fettled hatred or contrivances of mifchief, yet he feldom A a 3 feldom can be certain, that he has not failed by negligence, or indolence; that he has not been hindered from confulting the common interest by too much regard to his own ease, or too much indifference to the happiness of others. Nor is it neceffary, that, to feel this uneafinefs, the mind fhould be extended to any great diffusion of generofity, or melted by uncommon warmth of benevolence; for that prudence which the world teaches, and a quick fenfibility of private intereft, will direct us to fhun needlefs enmities; fince there is no man whofe kindness we may not fome time want, or by whofe malice we may not fome time fuffer. I have therefore frequently looked with wonder, and now and then with pity, at the thoughtleffness with which fome alienate from themselves the affections of all whom chance, bufinefs, or inclination, brings in their way. When we see a man pursuing fome darling intereft, without much regard to the opinion of the world, we justly confider him as corrupt and dangerous, but are not long in difcovering his motives; we fee him actuated by paffions which are hard to be refifted, and deluded by appearances which have dazzled ftronger eyes. But the greater part of those who set mankind at defiance by hourly irritation, and who live but to infufe malignity, and multiply enemies, have no hopes to fofter, no defigns to promote, nor any expectations of attaining power by infolence, or of climbing to greatness by trampling on others. They give up all the fweets of kindnefs, for the fake of peevishness, petulance, or gloom; and alienate the world by ne glect |